why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
Rumble strips road head = magical
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
