dear vagina, thank you for making it so goddamn hard to get pregnant. i love you.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
