Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Randomize
