So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
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