why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
