You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
Randomize