Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
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