I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
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