I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
Randomize
