it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
