Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Randomize
