its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
Randomize