Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
