I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
Randomize
