i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
Randomize
