Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize
