dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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