some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize