your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
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