im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
