Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
