There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
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