I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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