everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize
