You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize