how hairy? two words: wookie tits
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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