You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Randomize