All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize
