I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
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