I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Randomize