this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Randomize
