i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
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