Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
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