I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
So vagazzling was a success
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize