The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
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