Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
