he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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