I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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