i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
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