Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Randomize