I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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