Kiss
Puke
Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
i just woke up with two martini umbrellas taped to my nipples... idk how they got there
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
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