He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Randomize
