wanna go halves on a baby?
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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