Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Randomize