so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
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