My cat gives me a boner
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
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