Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
