Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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