just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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