I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
