Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
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