Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
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